A sweet friendship refreshes the soul. -Proverbs 27:9
Throughout our lives, people come and people go but those who choose to show up and take life’s journey with you, that’s your tribe.
In today’s business world, loving your tribe matters and it should, but I believe it’s so much bigger than building your tribe just to build your business. I’m not your ‘follow for follow’ girl!
We were made for connection. When the Creator of the universe made man, He gave him a companion and said: “it is not good that the man should be alone (Gen 2:18).” Each of us is intrinsically designed to NEED other people. Whether you are married, single, a parent, or empty nester, we all crave connection. The same is true in business.
The friendships and relationships we foster say a lot about our values. So does your tribe, as they will be a reflection of the things that matter to you.
What you share and how you share it will ultimately draw people to you or turn them away. Those who resonate with your message become your tribe.
Let’s keep it real for a moment. Friendships can be really hard! So can relationships with our spouses, parents, children, business partners and every other kind of relationship you can think of. Why? Because people can be difficult and disappointing, but then so can we.
Tribes, as they relate to business (and life), are simply people who voluntarily show up because they WANT TO, not because you’ve convinced them to. Ever been in one of those friendships or relationships where you’re really the only one showing up?
After years of showing up and working hard to build the relationship, I finally realized that I was the only one showing up. Relationships are two-way streets. If your tribe is showing up and you are not serving them well, shame on you! If you spend more time looking at your number of followers than you do thinking about ways to serve those who are ALREADY THERE, you’re missing the boat.
Perhaps you feel like you don’t know how to build your tribe. We’ve all been wronged by people we love. Sometimes, these hurts can be very deep and greatly impact our ability to truly bond with others. We can become people who find it difficult to trust.
How do I know this; because I’ve lived it.
What I learned growing up with an alcoholic parent is that you can’t count on people; they lie. This made it difficult for me to trust others; to believe that people would actually keep their word just wasn’t something I had experienced a lot of. These hurts also damage our embedded sense of community. When relationships are damaged by hurts, distance, or other life circumstances, it’s hard to build your ‘tribe’ of people who really know you.
True friendships require vulnerability, and so does building your tribe. This is easy to say, but can be hard to do! If we want to have true friendships with those who really ‘get us’, who can know our needs and cheer us on in our successes, we have to get vulnerable.
We have to acknowledge the hurts or past regrets we may have, then move on in the grace of today. When we get to that healthy place of living in the grace of today, we can surround ourselves with vibrant people who we can invest in and enjoy knowing on a deep, impactful level.
Why do I love my tribe? It’s not because they choose to follow me, although I’m grateful for that. It’s because we are of like mind, build each other up, celebrate the good times and the not so good times…we’re soul sisters.
As a tribe-builder, I’m always seeking ways for greater connection. If you have any suggestions on ways to make that happen, please share them in the comments. I’d truly LOVE to hear from you.